Some people tend to think suicide is selfish. It’s not. Never has been, never will be. Someone is not selfish because they decide they have had enough of being around anymore. It might look selfish to others but a person doesn’t just come to the decision to end their life and leave the people they love in agony.
It has to be a process before one finally reaches the point where they take their own life. It’s the very last symptom of the demon haunting them day and night. With those demons, you don’t control your thoughts they control you! Can you just imagine for just a few seconds, the pain someone must have been going through to decide enough is enough. For someone to think that it’s better to be dead than keep going through what they are going through, it has to be hard. It is sad, painful and a tragedy. If you have never reached that edge before you can’t possibly understand but this writing will help you understand. Well, try and help you understand the best way it can. So don’t judge just read, listen, help and understand.
The thoughts never hit you at 3am when you’re alone (of course you think and toss at that hour) but it hits worse at 3pm when someone is laughing with their friends, hanging out with family. They are halfway through the laugh and they just stop. It hits worse when you realize how happy your friends are but you’re not and you just don’t know why. Most of the time they have no one to talk to even though they are surrounded by friends and family. That is why some things are done in secret. That is why someone cuts themselves in the dark or hidden, someone throws up in private and someone takes their life in private. They are not being selfish, they are more of scared of what you’ll think or even taking care of you so you don’t have to worry.
Listen or better yet read, just don’t do it!
You might feel like you have the entire world on your shoulders. Like you have no one on your side, that you are all alone. You might be feeling like not being around is the only way you can help yourself. Quiet the voices. Chase away the demons. To reach the point that you want it all to end, is a point where most of us can’t even start to understand. Someone can’t even try to start understanding what drives someone to the edge of their own world. What can I say? It’s just the pain, the emptiness, the hurt, their demons, the voices, their insecurities, the lack of drive to live anymore. No one can actually pin point what drives someone to do it, do what? Commit suicide.
The feeling of despiser and worthlessness that a human can be going through has to be deep. At that point must someone be feeling like they have nowhere they belong, no one cares about them, they are no longer important. They just want it all to end.
“I just don’t want to exist anymore!”
Even though no one around seems to get what your going, just don’t do it! It must be hard to even focus on anything but not wanting to exist. But let’s do it this, stick around for one more just one more day. When night comes whisper to yourself,
“I made it through today, I will make it through tomorrow. Just one more day.”
All you need, all everyone needs is one more day. Who knows what will happen within those 24 hours. A stranger might smile at you, compliment you or even reach out to you. A friend may talk to you and you might just open up for your own benefit. A friend might notice your change of behavior. Someone, anyone might change your life just because you decided to stick around for one more day. It might not be much to live on with, but at least it’s something. That phrase will not take away your sadness, your pain, the emptiness you feel. It might not make anything better but it will keep you around for another day and another day and another day. Within those 24 hours if the voice comes and tells you just end it, you don’t deserve it. Do the most cliche thing and call anyone and just talk aimlessly about anything. They don’t need to know what’s going on, what we’re doing here is keeping you around and taking care of you!
The rest of us just need to notice the changes in our friends and family. We need to be there to listen. We don’t need to give a solution because you can’t give a solution to something you don’t even understand. Just listen and show you care, show we care. To keep him/her around so much longer.
Repeat, repeat, “Just one more day”
Even with tears in your eyes, “Just one more day”
JUST ONE MORE DAY!
Stay safe stay happy 💋